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Free Graduation Speeches

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Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt,
so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. - Collosians 4:6

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If you've been searching the Internet for "Free Graduation Speeches" you're likely looking for a speech to copy-paste-and-use-as-it.  That is one option which you can certainly try with the speech below.  But I still recommend you use this one as an idea booster to help you come up with a customized one for yourself.  The notes at the end of the speech will be especially helpful with just that...

Free Graduation Speeches Example

As president of the Associated Students of Dakota College I was asked to say a few words to you on this momentous day. Since I couldn’t come up with anything meaningful or wise or profound, I decided to speak as each of you know me. Someone slightly less than wise and profound.

Most of us never expected to be here today. Frankly, neither did your parents nor most of your professors. From what I’ve heard in department meetings across campus we have been quite the unique group for this venerable institution. Apparently we’re the only class that had the absolutely stellar idea of liberating the Agriculture College’s prize goats and hobbling them on President Smith’s front lawn. For some reason this little episode was highly frowned upon. After all President Smith, you lawn was cropped short enough as not to need cutting for a good month and it was fertilized at the same time!

In addition, I was informed that taking Chi Alpha Theta’s half-sized model of a Greek warship and using it to block the entrance to the Navy ROTC’s building was inappropriate. As were running up the pirate skull and crossbones pennant on their flagpole and hijacking the carillon’s loudspeaker to play the soundtrack to Disney’s Peter Pan. These two little events are just some of the reasons why your professors and the school’s officers never thought we’d leave! Maybe an investigation should be done on the grades handed out this final semester.

Seriously, we’ve done a lot of growing up these past four, five and even six years for some of us. We were just high-spirited, rambunctious youth when we entered these halls and now we’re downtrodden automatons ready for the working world. Our teachers can take pride in and full credit for this transformation.

We’ve spent countless hours studying and working to get to today when we can finally chuck it all and go be true college graduates, living the life of a professional beach or ski bum. At least until our student loans come due. Then we’ll find minimum wage jobs so we can be part time beach or ski bums. We are definitely a class with great motivation and ambition!

I could reminisce about many of our other memorable achievements, but due to the presence of parents in our audience I’ll let you contemplate that history on your own. Parents, just a word of caution – if later today your son or daughter spontaneously erupts into peals of laughter you might not want to ask about it.

I would like to thank all of our families for coming to share today with us. You made many sacrifices to send and keep us at this institution and we really are grateful. We are also grateful for the faculty of Dakota College for being such top-notch, intelligent and caring people. We sat under your tutelage and you opened our eyes to the possibilities the world holds for us.

Finally, I would like to thank the student body. You asked me to be your president and I accepted with complete humility and dignity as befitting such an exalted position. I hope I have not let you down. I believe our final year has truly been a culmination of what I’ve worked for these past four years. Our class has gone down in the record books – not for academic success but then again they can’t expect everything from us! Go forth, Dakota College Class of 2012 and continue our great tradition!

Free Graduation Speeches Example Notes

Note that this speech is specifically humorous, since funny speeches often work well at more informal and relaxed events such as graduation ceremonies.  You might need to adjust that, depending on the occasion you'll be speaking at.

If you choose to incorporate a lot of humor or jokes in your speech, I advise you to...

- Avoid being silly.  There's a big difference between stylish and smart humor, and silliness or stupidity.  If you're going to ascend the stage telling dirty jokes or making borderline comments, you'll leave as the class clown, and not in good standing.  So use humor, but use it wisely.

- Is still respectful towards teachers and parents and gives thanks.  Certain elements, like thanksgiving and honor, should be present in any graduation speech, and the sample one above includes it as well.

For a more thorough review of other necessary things you should include in your college graduation speech, have a look at the other Sample Graduation Speech example.
Not all free graduation speeches are created equal!  Some (like the one on this page) have been carefully researched and written to give you an edge in composing your own, while others are nothing more than a large collection of clichés thrown together, scrapbooking style!